How to Fix The Millennial Attitude Problem
Over the years, Millennials have established themselves as a generation with a serious attitude problem. After extensive testing and experimentation on Millennials themselves, as well as their children, I have compiled a list of techniques and supplements that seem best suited to provide relief to Millennial attitude problems. Keep in mind that none of this should be taken as medical advice, especially seeing as how much (all) of this testing went on without the consent of the individuals involved.
Members of the Worst Generation are feeble minded at best. Their awful diets and Jersey Shore lifestyles leave them with the lowest stress tolerance of any group of humans I’ve been unfortunate enough to study. For the love of God Millennials, try eating real foods.
Until you do, your brains will remain on ‘E’ when it comes to healthy mood transmitters, which causes you to “stop producing normal emotions on a consistent basis (Ross, Mood Cure).
There are plenty of adjectives to describe the Millennial attitude problem. The one you choose is typically a good indicator of the problem at hand.
Negative, obsessive, worried, irritable, and/or sleepless? Hit em with a healthy dose of serotonin, which has worked well in actual experiments as well as my own personal ‘implied consent’ trials. Serotonin can help you feel more positive, confident, flexible, and motivated. And wouldn’t you know it, most Millennials suffer from Serotonin deficiency.
How about wired, stressed, and/or overwhelmed? Force feed them some GABA filled foods and supplements. Their weak mindedness leads to “chronic stress”, which wears out the adrenal glands and leads Millennials down a path of laziness and obesity. GABA will make them more relaxed and free from stress. In other words, GABA may be the magic gumption tree these underachievers have long been searching for! Perhaps even providing the impetus to get them out of your basement and into gainful employment.
Most Millennials burnt out their dopamine receptors, and are long past the point of being able to feel anything without their choice of pick me up. Yet, there is a subset who is quite the opposite. The overly emotional group who tears up during commercials, and is unable to feel pleasure or positive emotions because they lack endorphins. These whiners need to consume more DLPA, B-vitamins, magnesium, + vitamin C. Typically in pill form.