Millennialism started around 1982, and didn’t stop wreaking havoc until 2002. This period is now known as the Snowflake Era.
The days when porno killed libido, gender became fluid, and testosterone became something your doctor prescribes. There will be no Millennial Iron Mike Tyson, Stone Cold Steve Austin,Chuck Norris, or Michael Jordan. But the worst generation does tell a story, and here it is.
Growing up in the golden age destined them to be spoiled. Despite sterling athletic heroes like Jordan, Tiger Woods, and Troy Aikman, they failed to grasp the value of what made these stars so spectacular. Hard work. Before they knew what hit them, the Allen Iverson’s of the world were showing up to remind them practice isn’t even worth talking about.
Every little thing was handed to them. The internet, flat televisions, and cell phones. Food got fast, and video games replaced physical movement. The standard set by the Jones’ was that Timmy would get an XBOX, just so long as he asked for Christmas. Their overstimulated minds were no match, and the reward circuitry of their brains turned numb. No more need for human interaction, which was replaced by the social media “like”.
Without realizing the extent of their children’s Millennialism, parents sent their kids off to college by the millions. Millennials, without supervision for the first time, drank copiously and continued to explore their social media worlds. Classes were easy, so long as you went with women’s studies or the liberal arts. And then, eventually, they began to graduate, and float lifelessly into the workforce.
It hasn’t gone well. Millennials are addicted to their cell phones, suffering from the compulsive need to take selfies. They even hear a ghost tone that makes them think their phone is going off when it isn’t.
The workplace isn’t particularly complicated. It’s a place to work. Not an easy task when you are nursing a marijuana hangover and cannot bear to look away from your phone. They didn’t fit in, and older folk began taking their spots for extra cash.
And so far, they have shown no signs of adjusting. They’d rather complain “me too” or scream “safe space!”, instead of committing to manual labor or adopting the first one there and last to leave mentality. I’ve had the misfortune of crossing paths with several packs of Millennials, and will continue to study and write about them at length.